It is a prominent phenomenon now that a lot of men are said to pretend, hiding their real character when they are in a relationship so as to make the ladies they are dating accept them as husbands upon proposal or either to obtain more trust from their partners in the case of scammers. At the end of all these where their purpose is achieved these men throw away their fake clothings and showcase their true characters which most of the times is irritable and unbearable for their partners. At this stage, a good number of the women concerned here can actually do nothing against this especially when marriage have been consummated.
This attitude is becoming more and more prominent in contemporary times and more complaints from women that have ever been received are recorded on daily basis. You hear of ladies complaining about physical and emotional abuses from their husbands who once proved to be a sweet, loving and caring boyfriend. A lot of people see this as a modern method of gender discrimination and slavery, which it is actually.
I have friends and family members who complain of this same inhumane and deceptive act on the part of men with no true conscience. This actually reveals that love was absent in the relationship no matter what these men did to show they loved. You can never pretend before someone you truly love, you will always be your true self because love does not hides from the one he loves.
The tips that will follow will surely help ladies to identify the man that is hiding something from them, I’m actually referring to the true character here.
Knowing the lion in sheep clothing early in a relationship will save you as a lady from most undesirable consequences.
1. His words are always sugar coated.
Beware, not all that glitters is gold. It is a common characteristics of love scammers to say sweet and enticing words most of the times. Even when you annoy him, he seems not to be angry. You tell him ‘sorry’ voluntarily for the wrong you did and instead of him accepting it, he says you should not worry, you did nothing wrong when you yourself know you committed an offence.
These might just be his tactics to deceive you. A true lover although will be nice to you often do get annoyed at times when you do something wrong and will never fail to point out your mistakes to you although in a polite way.
Also, a true lover rather than always saying sweet words to you will demonstrate his love for you through his actions. As it is said, ‘Action speaks louder than words.’
2. He lives a secretive life.
This is one of the main attitudes of criminals not only in the love aspect but in the general sense.
Any guy who fails to talk about his source of wealth but keeps spending on you all the times or fails to introduce you to his family members and friends after a certain stage of commitment where this introduction is necessary is a possible scammer or has a bad intention towards you.
A guy who is head over heels in love might hide things from his parents and friends but wouldn’t keep any secret from you. It is a natural thing to be open with the one you truly love.
3. Your parents and a good number of your close loved ones do not like him.
It is a common fact that elderly people can see farther than we younger persons can see. There is a popular African proverb that says, ‘What an elderly person stands on the ground and sights, a younger person even if he climbs a tree won’t see it.’ This is true indeed as elders have insight from their various experiences in life.
I have heard of a lot of ladies whose fiances where rejected by their parents and close relatives and friends on account that these men wouldn’t be good for them only for the ladies to learn this sad fact after marriage when the original character unveils.
You should learn to consider other people’s opinions especially those that contains elements of truth in them. Some people can easily detect a pretender, it is their gift so you need to pay attention to their advice on this aspect.
Remember that when you are deeply in love with a person or should I say infatuated as it is in most cases, it is your heart that speaks and no longer your mind hence your thoughts and decisions under this circumstance becomes distorted. In this situation, it is very difficult to spot if your partner is playing a hypocrite in the relationship. You will also be unable to identify and act on the major red flags that manifests in the cause of the relationship.
4. Get information from previous and current friends.
If you are opportune to come in contact with your fiance’s ex or friends, please do well to inquire about him, you can choose to ask basic questions about him but in an unsuspecting way inorder to obtain the truth. Know that you should not believe all that your partner tells you, there might be some elements of lies especially if he is a hypocrite or has a bad record.
His friends and relatives know much more about him than you, hence make good use of this information source. Note that the information you obtain here is also subject to verification before acting on them.
5. Do not neglect the power and wisdom in prayers
All of the above tips are human tips and are not 100% effective like prayer. A lot of people think they can do it all alone but I tell you it’s not possible. Whatever action you take and exclude God especially if intentionally is bound to fail.
While trying your best to find the good person for you, you can ask God to aid you know who is pretending and who has genuine interest in you. He will surely do this for you, I assure you of this.
Cultivate the habit of praying for your relationship and prospective marriage, including your partner and you.
The above measures listed are only part of the many ways ladies can employ to checkmate the frequent cases of lies and deceits they are encountering from men.
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